So far in March...

I haven't updated in so long. I've been so tired...and my life hasn't been very interesting. Just school basically.

Ashley's ball was a huge success :) We had a spectacular time with lots of food, fun presents, brownies and dancing! Ashley had like 4 birthdays. It was ridiculous, but awesome. So I hope you had a really great 25th birthday, Ashley, and that you felt loved by the people around you, because you are.

I was in a rotten mood towards the end of last week at work. I am really sick of answering the same questions. I honestly don't mind doing my job (ringing people up, showing people where things are, recommending music, books and bibles) but recently people have been so annoying because they see all the empty shelves and they have one of two reactions. First reaction, "what kind of business is this that you don't have EXACTLY WHAT I WANT? You USED to have it!!!" Or, second reaction, "why are there so many empty shelves? are you going out of business?" which then i reply "why, in fact, we are!" and then I am bombarded with the same questions "why? is business really that bad? is it the economy? what are YOU going to do? well, have you advertised?!"
I am frustrated because I feel like my boss doesn't have to answer all of these questions. I'm the person people see out there. I feel bad that he is losing his bookstore, but I think he should have gotten out a year ago like he told me was going to.
I feel stuck. If he hasn't closed by the middle of June, though, I will leave because of camp and I'm going to try and take two six week intensive classes at NOVA starting June 29th.
This is good though. I am glad I am aware of my frustration and I am aware when my attitude is becoming not caring towards the people who are asking questions. They don't know I've been asked the same thing all the time. God uses the tough times to teach us about ourselves. Obviously, I have a tendency to get overly frustrated and annoyed in this kind of situation. I hope that next week, when these questions come (and they will), I will be able to communicate well the predicament without giving out unnecessary information and will be patient with the questions of the customers. As well as the ridiculous statements like "Oh, God won't let this store close". Yeah, good luck with telling God what to do.

Mommy's birthday is today! I am so thankful that I have a Mommy like her. She is so understanding, loving, helpful and encouraging. Thank you, Mommy, for always loving me, even when I was acting like a brat. Daryl, Tara, Ashley and I got here something AWESOME. but we won't give it to her until tomorrow so I won't say what it is.
We ate food from Ivan's and I feel kind of sick. I think I ate too much...and then I had some of Ashley's jelly beans. My stomach feels weird. I hope I feel better soon so I can go to sleep. I have church in the morning.

Ashley and I watched a ridiculous amount of Twilight today (special features, commentary and finally the movie. what in the world.) Edward is definitely a fantasy man. He is beautiful, strong, dangerous, and is obsessed with the heroine, Bella. How misleading his character is. Every woman desires a man who will save her...and another part of her wants a man who is exciting/dangerous. We also want to fulfill him...save him from something. All of these elements can be found in Edward...but woe the girl who thinks she will find such a man.

It made me have conflicting feelings watching it. I miss the attention of someone, I miss the thrill of a new relationship but those things don't last for long. I was cleaning the kitchen with Ashley and told her about when my last boyfriend would clean the kitchen with me "just because he liked being with me". That ended after a month. So it makes me think, is all of that chemistry/flirting/excitement really worth losing it after a few months? I guess it's just important to realize that that stuff doesn't last. And relationships shouldn't be built around the excitement of it being new...because pretty soon...it'll be old.