"This is your year!"

The title of this post is a phrase I've heard from multiple people around my school in the past two weeks. What is it pertaining to? My relationship status. I know that the motive behind them saying it is a mixture of wanting me to be happy with someone and also their curiousness as to what I am like when I have a boyfriend. I think it secretly gives them a giggle thinking about "Momma Amber" (the girls' nickname for me) going googly eyed for some boy. But even though I know their teasing is all in good fun, I am finding myself completely discouraged by it. And it has unearthed a lot of sin in my life.

For as long as I can remember I have liked boys. At 4 years old I was crushin' on a lifeguard. At 5 years old I told my friends and parents about a boy I liked. I wasn't shy about it and could not keep it to myself. Over the years I have had a couple of not-so-serious relationships and one that was serious. Everyone always told me they thought I would be married by the time I graduated college. And this brings me to the sin that has been surfacing. I am a senior in college. I am almost 22 years old. So when my friends say, "This is your year!" I automatically think "YES IT IS! I deserve this! I'm ready! Lord, what in the world is going on? I thought this would have happened a long time ago! At least I thought I would be dating someone! My last boyfriend is getting MARRIED for heaven's sake! What happened to my turn?"
Wow. Talk about selfishness, pride, resentment, just all out sin.

And then the Lord showers his grace on me. And I am so thankful for his love, for his forgiveness and that because of his death I am free from the bondage of sin. I've been going through Romans the past couple of months and have just been blown away by God's goodness, love and mercy. Romans 3:21-24 says, "righteousness is given through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference between Jew and Gentile, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and all are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus."

So in those times when I begin to question why I'm not married yet I remember that if I never get married does not change the most important part about me: that I am free from sin and have been given the righteousness of Christ. I am a new creation in him. My life is to be an expression of all out worship to my King and I can do this by being married OR single!